“A Husband for Margaret” by Ruth Ann Nordin

Ruth Ann Nordin is back, people! And this time we’re finding a husband for Margaret. The much-anticipated (by me) follow up to “A Bride for Tom” kicks off only a couple of weeks after Jessica’s wedding, with Margaret nervously preparing to receive her mail order husband. At the ripe old age of twenty, she has officially given up finding a husband in Omaha, and posted an ad in the paper for a single man to come solve all her spinsterly problems.

Unfortunately, the bachelor who answered her ad up and died in a vague, horse-related accident. So, EARLY TWIST, his brother responds to the ad instead. And, DOUBLE EARLY TWIST, he’s got four unruly boys that need some serious mothering! Poor Margaret is going to rue the day she ever posted that stupid ad.

Understandably, she considers sending the whole family back to where they came from, but her best friend Jessica (who has somehow turned into a bleeding heart philanthropist since she married Tom) insists that Brother Joseph stay local while her friend gives it a good think. “Oh, you can’t stay at a motel!” insists Jessica. “They won’t even be invented for another sixty-five years!”  She didn’t really say that last part, but I did.

So Joseph stays in town, and it’s a good thing, because the very next day Margaret decides to marry him after all. The verdict stems from a combination of her feeling guilty, selfish, desperate, and  Joseph’s being pretty hot.

They get married a week later, and right before Margaret walks down the aisle, a woman named Debra Potter walks up to Margaret and insists that Joseph is supposed to be marrying her. Um, all evidence to the contrary, bitch. Which is pretty much what Margaret tells her. That Margaret is a spitfire! So Potter goes, but not too far. We haven’t seen the last of that hussy.

Joseph and Margaret and the kids all move into Margaret’s dream house after the wedding (which Joseph apparently bought for her that day. Was it even for sale? Who cares!), and they totally have wedding night sex. It’s kind of a weird scene, but then again so is wedding night sex (probably).  But Joseph is just lulling Margaret into a false sense of security because…

GOOD MORNING! You’re now a mother of four! Joseph heads off to work, despite his promise not to leave Margaret alone to figure out this parenting stuff by herself, and Margaret is stuck with four strangers under the age of 7. Fun times.

She takes them to the park and is immediately accosted by Debra Potter and Jessica’s ex-fiancee’s overbearing mother, Connie, whom you may remember from A Bride for Tom. We just can’t seem to get rid of that bitch. They accuse Margaret of being a terrible mother, which… sure she is, but it’s also been less than 24 hours since she’s had possession of these children. Cut the woman some slack! Margaret fights back though, which is sort of nice to see, but the sting is taken out of her comebacks when the youngest kid poops his pants.

Eventually she starts to figure this parenting thing out, with help from the boys who are well intentioned but also very young and full of life. However, this Potter person refuses to leave Margaret alone and keeps insisting that Margie will leave Joseph eventually. At which point Joseph will run into Debra’s arms, despite the fact that he’s never shown the least bit of interest in her.

So Margaret hatches a scheme to set Potter up with Peter (Jessica’s ex-fiancée), because that poor guy definitely needs one more domineering woman in his life. She bribes the kids with candy and cookies to be super rotten, and then stages a big fight with Joseph right in front of Potter. Margaret storms off, thrusting the kids at Potter, and says, “They’re all yours!” Margaret then slinks off to hide behind a tree and watch the hilarity. Poor Potter lasts about 10 minutes before realizing she definitely does NOT want to be a mother of four, and surrenders.

Phase 2 of the plan is getting Connie to get a mother-in-law hard on for Potter, which is easily done through a little reverse psychology. Connie immediately realizes Potter is a catch, and the deed is done. Well that was easy!

Cut to a year later, and Margaret is the proud mother of a new baby girl. Thank God it wasn’t another boy. Jessica also has a four-month old little girl. Here’s betting we’ll be reading about their marital misadventures in a new series of books soon. THE END!

I am happy to report that “A Husband for Margaret” was waaay better than its predecessor. Too bad that really isn’t saying much. I give it three stars because the characters were more likeable than the previous book, but still subtracting points for a skimpy plot and historical inaccuracies. Dear Ruth Ann Nordin, it’s called Wikipedia. Use it. Xo, Megan

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Comments
One Response to ““A Husband for Margaret” by Ruth Ann Nordin”
  1. mae says:

    Aw, this was a really nice post. In idea I would like to put in writing like this additionally – taking time and actual effort to make a very good article… but what can I say… I procrastinate alot and by no means seem to get something done.

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